Been diving too deep by myself.

Once again, I'm really and deeply disappointed in myself.

I can't get thing straight like I used to do.

I can't make the right decision.

Wrong decisions upon wrong decisions.

These mistakes are really catching up on me. I really don't know how much left in me, myself to keep me going. Even there are some, is it enough for me to finish this long rally. Man, I'm really down right now. Feel so empty. Is it because I'm not giving enough or it's just too hard for me. Why there are so little thing I can deal with? Why can't I be like my sister, as strong as she is, as intelligent as she is and as determined as she is. To all my buddies, sorry for being such a jerk, sorry for failing you guys.