傻

傻傻的我。。傻傻在等。。总有一天会等到你

A Fall..

Man. It's only the 2nd battle that I had for this war but somehow i felt like getting a few head shots in a row. For the 1st time, i felt this bad. If things did not go well and out of my control, I failed my mum. That makes me feel like I failed the whole world and of course myself. It somehow felt like you are left undecided whether to push you off the cliff or just left you hanging on the edge. This will be the biggest fall ever in my life. Things have to change, changes need to be done. There are two more battles coming. Got to force myself up from the falling edge to keep things going. Hope for the best. Have faith and believe.

Peace y'all. Good luck to you all. All the best.

我等。。

我等， 我一直都在等， 我会一直等下去， 耐心的等。

好吗？

如果可以，再给我两年的时间好吗？

猜不透

猜不透，
你心里想的，
你想拥有的，
你喜欢的，
你爱惜的，
你爱护的，
你在乎的。

握着

现在的我手里握着是空气里的孤单，如果可以我想紧紧握着你的手，牵着你一直走下去。

I don't know

I wish you can understand me better,
I wish I can know you better.

You Are Special to Me

You are something special,
Your eyes,
Your smile,
Your personality,
Something I’ll fall for,
Something I’ll never forget,
Something I’ll wish to keep it by my side.

Something for my future

I'm always in my own comfort zone. Safe and secure. Stepping out from my comfort zone always put me into situations which I hate. Got me thinking a lot. Killing lots of my brain cells. Lots of sleepless night. The hardest thing for me is to decide whether should I take the 1st step out of my comfort zone. I guess I did. First of all, before this I never let people say shit thing about me even just a normal teasing like noob or newbie. But now whenever I heard people call me noob, I'll take it in. Because people call you noob for a reason. Find a way to improve yourself, face the reality of this world, its cruel, its harsh but learn to take thing differently. There are still lots of space for me to improve, all sorts of thing. Things like, How to be a better person? How to let your friends have greater trust in you? How to deal with things that seems hard? Other than this, I decided to get myself committed to something which I always take it as a red zone thingy because I'm always scared of commitments. Alright, I kinda get myself involved in a club, is something that I'm familiar with, is something that kills you if you take it the wrong way and is something take make you a better person. Basically, I take up this commitment for a couple reason.

First, LIfe is too short for everything. Appreciate everything, appreciate chances.

Second, helping a few people who are special to me as a favor for me to return what they have done for me. THANK YOU.

Thirdly, I want to be a better person. I want to do better. Time management is a big issue. Good social skill is a big issue. Having great responsibility on your shoulder is a big issue. I'm taking my chances. I'm trying to make the best thing out of my life.

So, if what I am in the future. Its what you guys have given me. Accepting me. Lending me a hand. Walking side by side with me. Thank you all. May all the joy and happiness fall upon you all.

My thoughts after I saw a BEAUTIFUL girl today.

Enough of all the movie-like scene life. Waiting for something which others see it as a fairytale. Sick of it. Hate it. Get it over with. Time to snap back to reality. Reality is just so simple yet so hard to archive, that is be a millionaire or billionaire. Wealth equals power. I was always told that girls in this world will be craving for guys who care for them when they are lonely, wipe their tears off when they are deep down, cheer them up when everything seems so wrong, giving them all the supports and helps when they seems so helpless and lastly love them. All this while, I though guys with these 5 basics will basically have a life that all of us had never imagine before. HAHA.

Things happened, I see, I hear and I understand. Lot of girls out there really got my head spinning, I don't understand why they stick to guys who can't give them the 5 basics. What these guys are giving them are just money love. Yea! MONEY LOVE that is what I called. Money Love is something like a guy is using the parents money as if these money belong to him and spend it on him and his girl, just to have his ego up high. NIKE or what so ever branded stuffs from top to bottom. Man. That's BULL man. BULL. Driving your parent cars as if they belong to you. Get a life, boy. I know there are a lots of people out there right now is having a life like the one you see in a fairy tale but not everyone is that lucky. To be honest, I'm jealous of it. It's true and I admitted it. One things that keep bugging me is people from the Fairy tale life can be very different. Some are good but some are just the worst person you ever seen in your life. Okay, I know, I get it. OKAY. Stop showing off. Keep it to yourselves. You are so F rich, so what?

I always thought even without all the wealth, I can start a life with my strong will and both my hands but all what I'm seeing keep on proving me wrong. Pushing me to the edge. So, what is in your mind?

WITH & WITHOUT

Without my family around me, I'm nothing,

With my friend, I have everything,

Without you, I'm alone,

With you, my heartbeats pound harder,

Without your smile, my world faded,

With your laughter, everything seems perfect.

Before was MOTTIE....now is WILLIE

I do not how many you guys out there still remember about MoTTie. Alright guys, let me recall all of your memory. Mottie is a bird that flew and trapped itself in the empty room opposite of mine on a Sunday early morning. That lil Mottie never gave up of trying to find a way back to the freedom it had before it took the wrong path end up trapped in that room. Even though there were large enough air columns for it to flew out but it seems confuse. Instead of flying out from the air columns, it kept on bumping against the transparent window panel. I tried to help but the wall is just too high for me to get through. I tired to stacked up tables and chairs, it did not work. To my surprise when I finally climbed up to the top of the stacked chairs, as if Mottie was waiting for me. It looked straight into my eyes. I could see Mottie was trying to tell me something, all of its feathers are messed up. Trial after trial. It never stopped but after sometimes finally it figured out and flew back to where it belongs. After that I went to the back where Mottie flew out. It was chirping while flying close to the balcony with other two birds. They flew round and round. Chirping continuously with joy, I guessed. After that, I came back to my room and sat down. I had a long thought. I think Mottie was sent by God to show me life is never is easy. The way ot path that seems easiest does not means it is the right way out. People confuse over lots of things so as Mottie. Mottie taught me a very important lessons. That is "NEVER EVER GIVE UP!". It never gave up even though it was hurting itself while trying to find a way out. Mottie did not gave up so Why ME??

Last night, there is another bird that came and visited me, in a way I guessed. I named it WILLIE. Because it was trapped in one of the center air column. Same thing happen but this time it came in the evening. It was confused once again and thinking of taking the easiest way out. So, end up bumping itself against the center glass panels. Willie did the same thing as Mottie did. Never gave up. Willie was trying to find a way out, the name WILLIE basically came after the word WILL. Willie was trapped for at least 12 hours. The will that Willie had basically showed the clear path out of there. I guessed is a sign form God again. Because everytime when I was in deep shit mode. Birds just keep on coming.

Two main things I want to share with you all is no matter what we are doing, we should always be motivated and never give up. With a strong will deep in your heart, no matter how hard our lives is; we shall have the strength to endure all the pains and keep our head up high while facing all the challenges in lives.

Something I like to share...

Guy with ego keeps it low + Girl with attitude keeps it cool = A fine couple...

Do call her if you are a gentleman,

Please call her if you still care about her,

Must call her if you love her.

All the best wishes to all the couples out there. Peace y'll

Been diving too deep by myself.

Once again, I'm really and deeply disappointed in myself.

I can't get thing straight like I used to do.

I can't make the right decision.

Wrong decisions upon wrong decisions.

These mistakes are really catching up on me. I really don't know how much left in me, myself to keep me going. Even there are some, is it enough for me to finish this long rally. Man, I'm really down right now. Feel so empty. Is it because I'm not giving enough or it's just too hard for me. Why there are so little thing I can deal with? Why can't I be like my sister, as strong as she is, as intelligent as she is and as determined as she is. To all my buddies, sorry for being such a jerk, sorry for failing you guys.

Back to WAR ZONE and Stop TRIPPIN' man

I am back to this familiar war zone since last Thursday. It looks familiar to me but somehow it ain't. I have to admit things are not like the last time when I'm here. But I ain't complaining a single bit of it. And I have to live through it. I gotta stop trippin' and get back to what I'm suppose to do. I came back here for reasons upon reasons.

For all this while I realized I have been cheating myself. Going back and forth from reality world to fantasy world. Sometimes, things ain't what I want to see but I just kept giving myself reasons to have a quick get away. This ain't right man. I gotta snap out from that cause every get away I had is making ma life harder and harder. Harder for me to breath, harder for me to wake up every morning, harder for me to speak and harder for me to live this life.

I'm sick of it. Seriously. NO more quick gettaway. Face it and Deal with it. Thats what I'm born to do. I know I'm special. Each and everyone out there are special too. I know it takes time for me to stand up once more, once and for all but I ain't giving up. and Wish me luck guys. Peace y'll, I'm out.

The CNY : 2nd day.

Lots of stuff are going on. Everything happen like they are suppose to. I guess you guys know what I mean. It's Chinese New Year. Yeah....as for today me and ma family went to shopping mall after visiting because we are just too bored. Then, I kinda went searching for notes books or exercise books for the coming sem. Hmmm..I guess something wrong with me man...I guess I got used to the hectic life all this while. I hope this kind of feeling will keep me going all the way. And one more thing is ma sis is going back to AUS very soon. Its kinda like we just do not have enough time together. She was back on NOV last sem but I was doing ma summer sem. Now, I'm back she is leaving. Oh boy oh boy. See how things go. Hope for best, make every second counts.

Appreciation

I don't know what to say. man..Just a simple thank....a sincere one should do..thank you all. Ma buddies....I appreciate it. Peace y'all. I'm out....

One more time...

I have been studying for non-stop since last year August. For once in ma life time, I have been quarantined from all de fun and freedom people enjoying rite now for this long. BUT, I had chose to take this path. A path that most take it as if I'm a dumb person to do such a thing. To be honest with you all, I have never regret of taking this summer sem. I like it. I enjoy it. If i have not take this summer sem, I will not get so close to ma buddies for both study and basketball.

As for basketball, me n ma buddies basically improved a lot under the guidance of DANIEL, our coach. I never expect to play a single game with DANIEL but this summer sem gave me chances to play n learn from him. I was so afraid of DANIEL before but when I get to noe him better he is just as nice as u wish he is.

As for study, I can say is fun. At the beginning, me and Colin are like fooling in class all day long but then we still are doing good. Then later, we started to form group study with MIKE who drive a red "KANCIL" haha...and things just keep getting better and better. We are supposed to have YLT meeting but then as a member of YLT we should care and understand our, ZOO. She has been given special privilege for spending FULL time with her BAOBEI. We all are doing fine. Now, the only thing left for us is final.

SO, guys c'mon lets strive for one last time before this summer sem end. Wish u guys all the best and good luck. PEACE y'll. I'm OUT.

Is SHOW TIME..

With all the joy and relief, I guess is time for me to get back on track. Get serious with the on coming waves. Very soon after getting through this waves I'll be heading home from this war zone.

Before that, I have to be 100% NONONO 110% ready to face my Test 3 and of course the Final. I have faith and beliefs in myself. I want to end this nicely one more time, better than the one before this. I got to put in everything I got into this. With my buddies with me, I guess after all the wars we gone through this might not be the easiest but another war that need support from one another like we always do. So, keep it up. Hang in there with me, I'll do everything I can to make sure we get through this with smile on our faces. Time to get serious and do what I gotta do. Wish me luck guys, thank you for all the support you guys have given me. Thanks.

All rite guys, enough with the formal stuff man...I do ma best in ma test and that will be ma commitment to y'll...peace y'll....I'm out...

King of KINGS, Queen of QUEENS

Thank you.

Thank you guys if it wasn't because of you guys I have probably gave up at the last pit stop,

Thank you guys for pulling me out from the dead,

Thank you guys for not giving up on me,

Thank you guys for sharing all the laughters and sweats together,

Thank you guys for all the loves and hates,

I appreciate each and every single bit of it.

Another chapter of life, this might be the hardest and most emotional chapter I ever gone through. Wave of challenges going against us leaving us with no choice but to fight back with tears, fatigue and guts. We broke into pieces, we cried, we screamed and wished for hope to come around and bring us out of this misery upon misery. But it doesn't seem to work, we were on the edge of falling. Just then, we realized how strong we are, how strong we can be. With all of us around basically we are the most fearsome human beings that ever live on this planet. With a little encouragement from one another, we stood still facing the endless waves with no fear but a smile on the face. We are the King of KINGS and Queen of QUEENS. This basically changes everything. Changes my life changes my thoughts forever. Without you guys I'm nothing. I owe you guys big time. Thank you. With my own will, I'm gonna make this world a better place to live in. Peace y'll...I'm out.

Summer sem

I think summer semester is gonna end very soon but i got two more quiz to go and a final paper. Hell ya. Kinda sucky thou. It doesn't matter because the worst part is gonna unveil soon..very soon. I just wish I will get what I deserved. Thats all, that will be the bottom line. Nothing more, Nothing less. Today I got a lot to do as I gotta move myself out from ma crib and move to ma new crib which is just opposite ma old one. After moving everything I guess I'm go straight to have ma lunch and then take bath. After that, most probably gonna have a short nap then study, man. Ma mission today is to finish what I have planned for maself. Is not about whether I have to do it or not but is a MUST. So, guys wish me luck. I tried ma best not to fail you guys. Peace y'll over and out..